You see it often; someone who has been absent from your twitter stream, suddenly back.  You just have to ask, “Haven’t seen you.  Where have you been?”  And the inevitably answer comes, “I’ve been having a break from Twitter.”

Good old Twitter.  You don’t have to pick up its socks, have that serious talk or even need to help it when it’s sad.  So why do so many people decide to temporarily, or permanently, break up with it?

Here are some of the reasons I know and some which I just figured out myself

  • You’re an obsessive compulsive and you are literally addicted to being on twitter.  So much so you aren’t functioning at work because all you do is wonder what people are doing in the real world of twitter
  • You’ve shagged one of your twitter mates and the last person you want to run into is your ex-shag
  • You’ve had a week of people just talking about shit you don’t understand and it’s so brutally mundane it has made you question why you’re even spending so much time talking to people you mostly have never met
  • You went on holiday and the roaming charges would mean you had to take out a second mortgage
  • Your computer got stolen thanks to a home break-in
  • You’re sick, drunk or depressed
  • Twitter closed your account for posting obscene stuff and it’s taken you this long to get a new account and tell all your old followers you’re back
  • You got trolled and you need time to recover
  • You got hacked and haven’t been brave enough to show your avi again
  • You find our your old twitter shag is shagging one of your favourite followers
  • You ended up at a party and it was so good you just haven’t made it back to your computer just yet
  • Your partner finally had enough with your twitter habits and threatened to leave
  • You have nothing witty or even mildly intelligent to say

And my favourite reason why you have a break from Twitter is

  • Because you’ve fallen in love and real life it much more exciting that floating in the ether with your 1326 followers who are mainly porn bots